How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

Women's rights...

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

Do you want icecream, Björn?

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

Why do monkeys fly with their wings? Because Elephants tend to run out of battery.

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

Your mom is so fat she wears large clothes

Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...