What does Santa do on Halloween? He gives out candy to the kids who come to his door.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

boobs!

How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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