What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

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What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

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Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

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Whats black and hangs from the my tree? A tire swing.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

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How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

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where do some birds live in? Earth

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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