What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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What did the white father tell his mexicon son and his wife as he left for work bye

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Why did the spoon say hi to the fork? To initiate a conversation.

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Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

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What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two solely on her hair color, proceeds to kill them with a single shot glass. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

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whats worst then dieng in a videogame

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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