Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

The Holocaust

monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

I thoroughly dislike arabs, I lost both my parents in the events of 9/11.

How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

What's the difference between? Your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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