A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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David Silberberg is gay

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Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

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A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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a man walks into a house. he gets shot in the leg and is brought to jail because he was a burglar and was trying to steal the family's tv.

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Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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Kevin Spacey is Kaiser Solze

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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What do Jim Carrey, Kim Jing-un and Justin Bieber have in common? A penis.

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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