what did hulk say when he was mad? im mad

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Wanna hear something funny? Sure. Okay,cool

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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Hey, austin, what are you doing?

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

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What's 9+10 20+1-1-1+2-1-1+1-2+1

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What did the mute say to the deaf man?

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How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

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A:Hi, do you like to blow bubbles? B:Yea... A:Hi, my names bubbles

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A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

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Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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LOLLLLLL! Lakers? making me laugh so hard! LMAO

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

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What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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