'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

more chocolate?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock whos there open the door and find out

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl fall down the stairs? Because her asshole brother pushed her :)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is white black and Chinese A panda

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops