Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

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What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

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roses are red, violets are blue, tom cruise is gay

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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what do you call a baby in a blender? A really funny event.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

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How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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21

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death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

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What did Tim say about his wife cheating on him with his best friend's wife? He ran to R Kelly and got peed on.

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

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Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops