When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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What's worse than stepping on a Lego? Leukemia

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

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Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Why do girls not have to have drivers license? Because they don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen ;) Don't mean to offend anybody! His joke is just funny

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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Hey

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Bob: Why did the chicken cross the road? Angus: To get to the other side... Bob: No. Chickens are unaware of the dangers of the road, and it was ignorant of the oncoming traffic during it's aimless wandering.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops