What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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whos district champs not JM

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What's the difference between a black man and a park seat? A park seat can support a family

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I would rather live in a world a chicken's motives would not be questioned.

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'Knock Knock' 'Who's there?' 'My name is Boo, I'm sorry,I think I was given the wrong address, I'll be on my way now' Boo walks away from the unsuspecting person's front door and goes to the next house along in the hope of finding the house he was originally searching for.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Oh, right

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops