Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

An Asian man fails a math test

your social life.

Yo momma is so ugly, that she has no mirrors in her home to avoid the feeling of disgust and sadness she gets whenever she sees her reflexion

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

>posts joke >mistaken for anti-joke

What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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