"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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What made the lady dance? Bandz!

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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In soviet russia, roses are violet

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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theres a black guy and a mexican whos driving the cop

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What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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