Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What do you call a black man about to jump off a cliff? Suicidal

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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split your ass cheek

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Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

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what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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