Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

Why couldn't the convicted felonist come back to America? He lost his passport.

Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

A:knock, knock B:who's there A:come in B:come in who A:me I'm gay

What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

What's the square root of 6739472? Who gives a f***?

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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