A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

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What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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