How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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