Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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What can move people but not rocks.. Poop

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Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

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whats the best thing about polio...death

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knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

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A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

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What did the kid say when his parents were killed? Nothing. He's a vegetable

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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