What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

all these jokes suck ass

A planes crashes on the US-Canada border. The survivors are promptly taken to a hospital nearby to be treated for their injuries.

squash squash who squash my ass

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings! What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Adelle....

that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

Your dads dead. lol

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

A man is on a date. His philandering causes a bitter divorce.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

And more;

Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

an athiest walks into a church

a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

What's white, black and tan? The people of planet earth.

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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