Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

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roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

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Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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heres a funny joke your momas so fat............

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

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Jews

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Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

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What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

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Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

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Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

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Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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uh uh uh uh .... oh i swallowed my gum

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. I ate it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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