Roses are red, Violets are violet.

what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

Q. Knock Knock A. Whose there? Q. how am i supposed to know why don't you answer it and find out you dumb ass! gosh.... people and their common sense these days!!

'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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