Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

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man: hey whats that in the corner? Bartender: thatssteve his wife left him and he is trying to drown his saddness is addiction.

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why did the man lose his testicle? he had cancer

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How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

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Women's rights

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what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

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Why did the kid fall off his swing? Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

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Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Why do blondes where knickers? to keep their ankles warm

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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which one is easiest

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knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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