Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

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???????????? ???????????? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? A wild EXEGGUTOR appeared!

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2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

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whats difference between womens rights now and 10 years ago? nothing, they are both just lies men tell women to make them feel good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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Why did the black guy flunk out of school? Because his socio-economic conditions and his lack of support from his parents didn't provide optimal learning conditions.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

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Why couldn't the convicted felonist come back to America? He lost his passport.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

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what is the difference between a banana and an orange? bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops