No, its just his eye, its infected, he gets fever and well, that is all I should say. Nero is my friend and I do not like it when people lie to him, he is outside having a cigarette, I do not think he wants to speak with you anymore. Bye.

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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knock knock There's no door

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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