What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

A baby walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "what'll ya have, Sport?" The baby's family runs in with a video camera screaming for joy over his first steps.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

A baby seal walks into a club

No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. They have been planning a girls night out for weeks.

What's worse than having sex with a woman who has been dead for 10 minutes? Having sex with a woman who has been alive for 10 minutes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website?

Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

What didnt rebecca black do today ride the bus

What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

Wanna know what makes me smilee? Facial Muscles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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