Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it it would break.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a gay dog? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down +29

fava beans

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

thumb_up thumb_down +23

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats hard, its not what you think a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops