How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

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A baby walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "what'll ya have, Sport?" The baby's family runs in with a video camera screaming for joy over his first steps.

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No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

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Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

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What happens when you park a new Cadillac with a roll of $100 dollar bills on the dashboard in a black neighborhod? Many residents of that peaceful community will briefly glance at it and admire the wealth of the automobile's owner.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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Two guys walk into a bar. One man walks out of the bar at a similiar time.

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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i love to lick...

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A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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Reading books

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What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

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A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why did the imagrint cross the road? Cuz he stole the chickin's job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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