"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Not Suzy" "Why?" "Because she has no arms"

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

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Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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so theres this big moose, and it walks into a convenience store and asks the lady bitch "where are the potatoes?" and she says "ehh, down aisle 5" so he goes down isle five, and there aint no potatoes

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Little Johnny asks his teacher "What's 23 times 3?" She yelled, "Be quiet, Johnny, and grow up!"

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

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Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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Why do so many Koreans go to medical school? Practicing medicine is a rewarding and respected career.

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There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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Alchohol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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