Why was the black man so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

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What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

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There's my tractor.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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Hi

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A cop

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Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops