a woman votes!

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

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What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

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All the other dinosaurs were laughing and teasing the tyrannosaurus because of his tiny arms. They left and the T.rex was sobbing uncontrollably next to a giant fern. "What's the matter little fellow?" said Jesus. The crying dinosaur looked down and said "I That's the end of my stupid puppet show, cuz I couldn't think of anything a blubbering dinosaur would say to our Lord and saviour.

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road. Because it was hit by a truck.

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I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

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Some black guy grabs a white guys wallet. the black guy says " hey I think you dropped this"

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

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Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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rarw

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops