I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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a mexecan guy walks in a bar he ask how much is a beer.its $400 and 55'.WHAT THATS SUCKSISH.no i just like to joke its 1 dollor.oh.....shut up go walk in a bra!!!!

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a white kid is called on by his teacher he is promptly sent to the principle's office after not complying.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

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Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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HURT

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

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Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he f**king felt like it!

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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Roses are red Violets are blue That's what they tell me Because I'm blind

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Roses are red, violets are blue! Damn, the florist messed up the colors again!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops