Two gorillas swing into a bar and are promptly escorted out because the gorillas are alcoholics.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "James" "James who?" "What the heck?You forgot me already?Its your bestfriend dude.Now let me in." ~Lil

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man walk into the bar? To purchase alcoholic beverages ready for consumption.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

long in the tooth!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, violets are blue. I know.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you get a blonde out of a tree? you politely ask her, then if all else fails call the local fire department

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Cheese stick

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops