A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Why don't you push a mexican off a bike, because its probably yours,

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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So heres a scenario. You and your twin brother are Siamese twins. You are straight and your brother is gay. Your bother has a friend come over. You only have one butt....

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Person 1: Hey Person 2: What's up? Person 1: Kill Yoself Person 2: Alright

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

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Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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http://richardfigures.com/

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what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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