Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Canadians

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If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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People...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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Alchohol.

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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you know whats worse than being cold? being colder

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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What do you get when a white person and a black person make a baby? A possible high functioning member of society.

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What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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s e m e n

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What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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