Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

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What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

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how many blondes did it take to fix a nuclear reactor? 1 she was a black japanese rapist

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because due to the crashing economy he feels the need tom travel far distanced for work and food to support his growing family, this causes him to take dangerous routes of travel through hazardous areas with fast moving automobiles that potential have the chance to kill or severely Maine the distressed chicken. Not only does he have to cross these roads twice a day he is also under the added pressure of many millions of people questions why he takes such chivalrous actions to save the his future descent and the steep decline in the population of chicken.

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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A women's opinion.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

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roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops