Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

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Why did the terminal cancer patient die? Because he fell of the stairs with his wheelchair.

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It smells like triangles in here.

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Thats sweet, thank you then.

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Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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What's red and checkered and tells you to turn your music down? Michael

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door.

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Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

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What's the worst part about censorship? **** *** **** **** *** **** *** ********.

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Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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