I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Heisenberg...

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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What number is funnier than 23? 24.

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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8

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

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How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

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What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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Knock Knock Go Away

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops