Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? You don't call him anything... You call for help.

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What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

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What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is ur chest as flat as ur back?

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

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Why did the black man die of leukemia? Overexposure to radioactive materials due to his career as a nuclear engineer.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Once upon a time, The end.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops