How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

im watching you..

A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

whos gay rusty kohlen hit him up on facebook!

ask me if im deaf. are you deaf? ...............

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

Knock Knock WHO'S THERE?????!!! y u mad? u have been knocking at the doors for 5 hours now, mom

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

Why did the police officer arrest Maxwell? Because he's black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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