Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

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"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? Because she was shot in the face by a lone gunman.

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whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

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what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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