What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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i am and me is i

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What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

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If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

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How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

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yo mamas so fat she probably has to wear a gerdle when she leaves the house.

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What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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