Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

in soviet russia, cow milks you

What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

I hate it when I get an erection and it pushes Pluto out of orbit.

How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

Hitler

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

This is an anti-anti-joke.

Why did the little boy get food poisoning? Because his family can't afford to buy organic food, and can only afford McDonald's burgers, where their cows are forced to stand in their own feces.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To return to the roost he had recently escaped.

I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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