How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Tell you something funny.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What happens when you step on Jupiter? You cannot.

Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

Did you hear about the man with 3 balls? He liked tennis

why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

What's similar about a mole and an eagle? They both are blind and dig through the ground. Except the eagle.

Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: It depends who is the owner of the car. .

Your mama is so fat that when she farted she called it global warming

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

Your Momma is so fat that she will most like lose a leg to diabetes which is totally preventable if she eats a well balanced diet. I hope she loses weight. Say hi to her from me please.

Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

Whats black and red inside? A black guy

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

your no better than a cockroach

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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