what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

This sentence is false.

Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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