What did the Pope say to the old homeless man who asked him for a blessing? Hahaha, no I won't give you a blessing

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

This sentence is false.

Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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