What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a person and one is a pizza.

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What has three eyes, scales, seventeen stomachs, and can produce milk? Nothing. Nature has not yet evolved any animal to these specifications.

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69

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

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A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

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And Stephen Hawking said.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

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Why are all of the cars in the left lane? Because you are in Winona MN.

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Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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Q: knock knock who is there A;dunno go check

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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why was the boy sad? because.

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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