10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

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What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

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Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

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your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

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women rights

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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A man walks into a bar and orders a sprite. Everyone in the bar looks and him funny and then laughs. He then tells them, "I would rather satisfy myself with a cool lemon-lime drink than put the poisonous toxins of alchohol into my blood stream."

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elen degeneres is straight....

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Why did the girl take a shower? Because she was dirty

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Where did Jimmy go during the bombing? An underground shelter where he would be kept from harm.

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What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? You did?! Oh . . .

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who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

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What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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