- Anti Joke

A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the blonde put tip-ex on the computer screen? To spite her physically abusive husband

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black and so is my neighbor

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

haha