Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

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What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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Yo mama's fat.

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why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

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A man walks into a bar. Wait, no, it was a horse. A man walks into a horse

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

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Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

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A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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A dolphin walks into a bar. Dolphins do not have legs therefore this is physically impossible.

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Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

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These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

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69- by Adam Chebali

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a whore.

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holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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