What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

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whats more serious than rape the holocaust

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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What Do You Call a Black Man With a Gun?? A Cop

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What's inside that man's house? Atoms.

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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Have you seen the 6th sense? Nope, is it good? Yeah Bruce Willis is dead

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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Did you hear about the homeless man? He asked me if I had any spare change. I didn't. I found the encounter to be very depressing.

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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What is Ciaran Wilkie Gay

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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