scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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What does a man that has to go to the bathroom do when there is no restroom within a reasonable walking radius? He gets in his car and drives to the nearest rest stop.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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Whats sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going off a cliff? A Caddy fits five.

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Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

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your mom died.

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I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

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When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

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8

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Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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-Ask me if i'm a crab. -Are you a crab? -No, why would i be a crab?

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i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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How many babies can you fit in a toilet? To be exact you would have to do all this math, so I tested it out myself and got 7.6.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops