knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

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Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

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What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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Wanna hear an anti-joke?

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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5

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My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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